Wordless Wednesday: When You’re Three, You Can Own an Island

Posted October 30th, 2007 by Jen in family life, the ranch
11 Comments »

About the photo: I call it Wheelbarrow Island. I just sat back and watched my kids turn an old wheelbarrow into a magical little place, with captains lost at sea, mysterious creatures of the deep, and a luau back at the beach. This thrills me to no end.

Awards, Carnivals & Contests

Posted October 28th, 2007 by Jen in carnivals
18 Comments »

I’ve received a few Blog Awards over the last several months, and I’ve been remiss in blogger etiquette, which is to pass on the awards. Thank you, again, to you wonderful bloggers who gave me these awards! The idea is to present these awards to up to 5 other bloggers, but I just nominated two per category in the interest of my time. So, here’s the ceremony:

The Blogger Reflection Award was presented to me by Mandi at Under His Construction. Thank you to a blogger who herself is amazingly reflective. I will pass this award along to:

Robert at Kintropy in Action: For his wonderful and sweet reflections on life with a disabled child, among other things.

Lydia at Little Blue School: Always an interesting subject being reflected upon over here, from NASA to three year olds playing the violin.

The Nice Matters Award was handed to me by Renae at Life Nurturing Education. I don’t know if I deserve this award…but these people do:

Michael at Chasing the Wind: He is such a nice blogger that he always responds to your comments, an important quality for interactive blogging; and he even responds with kindness when the commenter doesn’t deserve it.

Heather at Sprittibee: She’s also nice for the same reason - her blog is a forum, not a monologue. Always thoughtful and generous with her words.

The You Make Me Smile Award was granted me by e-Mom at Chrysalis, and if you visit her blog, you’ll inevitably leave with a grin. The folllowing bloggers would cause me to dimple if I had one:

Karen at The Thomas Institute: I love her cheerful photographs and the engaging stories of her little Thomas.

Jane at Shore Stories: I’m positive she’s already received this award, because she makes everybody smile! It’s her honesty, openness, and ability to laugh at herself that makes us all smile.

The I’m Fabulous Award was kindly bestowed upon me by Grace at Sandier Pastures, my friend in Dubai who thinks I have a fabulous country life. I think you’ll agree that these bloggers are fabulous:

Dana at Simple Pleasures: This is her “new” blog, and Principled Discovery is now here. You’ll love the uncomplicated and classic focus of this blog.

Mrs. Darling at Dishpan Dribble: Always a fabulous household tip or education idea to be found over here! This blogger has helped me more than any other on my journey to an organized home.

MOVING ON, I also wanted to note that the Carnival of Insanities is up. And the Contest Beat as well as Laura Williams’ Musings have been kind enough to include my Colorado Rockies contest, which does appear to border on insanity, as the Rockies are now 0 for 3 in the World Series. But just remember the 1960s Pittsburgh Pirates - they pulled it off, so can the Rockies!

Rockies, I Have Hope; and a Giveaway!

Posted October 26th, 2007 by Jen in sports, the office
5 Comments »

The World Series 2007 is underway, pitting the unlikely Colorado Rockies against the legendary Boston Red Sox. Two games into the series, and the Rockies are 0 for 2. For those of you who love to root for the underdog, you’ll understand my perhaps preposterous notion that the Colorado Rockies will win the World Series. Jayson Stark at ESPN said it first; while I don’t know if he continues to hold that position (Rockies win in six), I agree, except I think it will be won in seven.

I haven’t told my readers this yet, but I have a sports blog I started recently, and you can read my first post on the Rockies here, before they won the National League Championship, then here after sweeping the NL Series. You’ll read about a series of unlikely events that propelled the nearly unknown Rockies to the world stage; now the start of the World Series looks instead like a series of unfortunate events. But I have hope, speculative as it may be!

There’s the Coors Field advantage and the Colorado Rockies magic, and that’s what I hang my hope on. The advantage is not the beer, it’s the altitude, and the magic is a club that’s played together with one of the greatest team spirits in the leagues, doing the impossible at every turn.

While the thin air in Coors Field makes for long hits for both the Rockies and the Red Sox, it’s the seasoned Colorado pitcher who knows that his ball won’t get the same break who will most benefit in the next three games. And then I keep hearing about the spacious outfield - apparently it’s big? So, maybe lots of running for those non-acclimatized Red Sox who will be huffing and puffing.

And, oh, just to be home! I quoted another stanza of John Denver’s Rocky Mountain High in my previous post, but this time, the first four lines seem most appropriate:

He was born in the summer of his 27th year
Comin’ home to a place he’d never been before
He left yesterday behind him, you might say he was born again
You might say he found a key for every door

Let’s watch the Colorado Rockies be born again, and while I wrote earlier about the spiritual sense of that, I believe a new team will emerge back at Coors Field. The Rockies surely are coming home to a place they know well, but have absolutely never been before. I just read an article by Howard Bryant at ESPN, and I got another giant boost of optimism when I came across this bit of history about the Pittsburgh Pirates:

In 1960, the Pittsburgh Pirates lost World Series games to the Yankees by 16-3, 10-0 and 12-0 but won the Series in seven games, the last 10-9 on Bill Mazeroski’s famous Series-ending home run.

Oh, yes, it can be done! Stay tuned for Game 3 of the 2007 World Series on Saturday night.

*****

Do I have any Rockies fans out there?? For you bloggers who can’t get enough of the Colorado Rockies, here’s a free giveaway for you!

I have a gorgeous (free) Colorado Rockies stainless steel coffee mug for you! Here is how you can enter this Blog Give Away:

You must have a blog or website and write a piece (doesn’t have to be long) about the Colorado Rockies. Anything - funny, serious, satirical, or how you think I’m a nut to believe the Rockies have a chance in this Series. Be sure to include a link to this blog post, as well as a link to the Colorado Rockies stainless steel coffee mug at TeamMASCOT.com. This is our family business and I’ll pack it up myself for you! Leave me a comment here as well so I don’t miss your post, and so I can reply to you when you win.

I’ll keep this contest open until Friday, November 2, by which point the Colorado Rockies will have won the 2007 World Series! I’ll do a drawing for the winning entry on that date.

UPDATE: CONGRATULATIONS TO THE BOSTON RED SOX - IF YOU WOULD INSTEAD LIKE A BOSTON RED SOX STAINLESS STEEL COFFEE MUG, I’M HAPPY TO OFFER THAT AS WELL!

It’s Colorado Rocky Mountain High…I’ve seen it rainin’ fire in the sky…

Humidifying Secrets From Coors Field

Wordless Wednesday: Strange Things Around Town

Posted October 24th, 2007 by Jen in carnivals, family life
6 Comments »

About my photo: No Photoshop tricks, this really is a giant fireplace in the middle of the desert in Redmond, Oregon. I didn’t see any remains of a house, just a concrete strip leading to the fireplace. There’s another fireplace just like it a few yards away. I need to ask around, but I have no idea what to think.

Blog Carnivals to visit:
Carnival of Family Life
Carnival of Homeschooling
Christian Carnival

Project Generation Connections

Posted October 22nd, 2007 by Jen in education, family life, parenting
9 Comments »

Do you sense a disconnect between generations? This report is one of many which shows a detachment of today’s young people to their heritage and history. Many factors could be at work, including the breakdown of families, loss of respect for (including neglect and abuse of) elders, an ultra-mobile society in which children, parents, and grandparents rarely live in the same town anymore, and even technology heightens the disconnect.

In my family, I try to repair this disconnect by giving my kids ample opportunities to understand the lives of their elders. Since my (nearly 79 year old) mother has lived with us for eight years now, my children are accustomed to having a senior in their everyday life.

If that’s not the case for you, try to make it a priority to include grandparents or other seniors in your daily life. I’m sure there is a neighbor, a friend’s grandmother, or your own parent or grandparent in close enough proximity to make this a reality.

My current project is a series of interviews with my mom to try to capture a bit of life in her generation. I came across a great article entitled Family History is American History which makes a positive case for this kind of documenting:

Family history is a way to preserve American history. Tapping the memories of seniors will give the young alternative ways to think about the events, issues and challenges presented in public schools.

Here is one of our recent interviews, where my six year old daughter, J, helped me conduct the interview:

J: Did you like being in the Army?

Grandma: Yes. It was just lots of fun. It was interesting. I like marching and singing songs while we marched. I liked the outdoor exercises we went through. Crawling through the woods on our stomachs to practice for a gas attack - we wore real gas masks.

J: How come you don’t like water?

Grandma: Because I’m afraid of getting drowned. Once, I was wading in the water along Lake Huron, and all of a sudden I stepped off a shelf and I sank and I couldn’t get up. I didn’t know how to swim, but someone came and pulled me out.

J: Did you play music in the army?

Grandma: Yes, I had my accordian with me. Sometimes the girls and I would sit out in front of the barracks - there was a porch across the front of the barracks - and another girl would play her guitar, Emily Lackanaria was her name.

J: Did you like playing the accordian?

Grandma: Yes, I loved playing the accordian! I just loved music.

J: How old were you in the Army?

Grandma: I think I was 27 and I enlisted for 2 years.

J: Why did you leave the Army?

Grandma: I just decided I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life in the Army. I don’t know.

Grandma: What I remember about when the Second World War was going on…my Dad was in charge of two blocks for ….Air Raid Warden, that’s what he was. He had to go around and be sure everyone had their blackout curtains up - no lights showing.

J: How come?

Grandma: So any enemy airplanes flying over wouldn’t see the houses. Because we lived across the river (the St. Clair River) from a huge oil refinery which may have been a target for German planes. And my Dad worked for Mueller Brass - I guess anything that produced things for the war effort would be an enemy target.

Well, you get the idea. I like including my children in the interview process, because they will be more involved, absorb more of her life as she speaks to what they want to know about, and she will be communicating directly to them. When I teach my kids about World War II, they will already have this framework to layer the information upon - a very real, tangible fabric that brings to life dry facts of history.

Here’s a fun generation-connecting lesson to be learned from the American Crow:

It maintains a territory year-round in which all members of its extended family live and forage together.

In most, but not all, populations the young stay with their parents and help them raise young in subsequent years. Families may include up to 15 individuals and contain young from five different years.

Some roosts have been forming in the same general area for well over 100 years.

Generational connections can bring health to our extended family life, increase our knowledge of family history, and surely promote knowledge of our national history. Are your children terrified of “old people”? My kids certainly have that tendency, because our society is prone to segregating our senior citizens. I have to be purposeful about fostering these generational connections, even with Grandma living with us. Tell me if you have any ideas for a Project Generation Connections!

Pumpkin Patch/Petting Zoo in Black and White

Posted October 19th, 2007 by Jen in arts & crafts, family life
6 Comments »

We visited the pumpkin patch this week, and the kids have been happily drawing faces on their new orange buddies. We won’t carve them for another week, since we like them to last at least until October 31 without withering and wrinkling.

I am lucky enough to have two fabulous pumpkin patches within ten minutes of my house. The farm we went to this week has a petting zoo, a play area with a hay maze, a country store filled with homestyle goodies, hay rides, and of course the pumpkins. Next week, we’ll visit the other pumpkin patch.

Here are a few of my photos, in glorious black & white, from our outing.

The Kids and I in the Pumpkin Patch

My Country Girl with Radio Flyer Wagon

My Farm Boy is Ready to Wrangle

The Big Boy Feeds the Llama

Bunny Love for My Animal Loving Girl

Umm, What to Say…Welcome to Sweet Farm Life

Wordless Wednesday: Ride Off Into the Sunset

Posted October 16th, 2007 by Jen in carnivals, the ranch
8 Comments »

I captured these sunset-kissed railroad tracks on my way home one evening, and couldn’t help but think of Lady’s magic gold dust (for you Thomas the Tank Engine fans).

Blog Carnivals to catch:

The Carnival of Homeschooling
The Christian Carnival
The Carnival of Family Life
The Festival of Frugality

Heart and Home of Simplicity

Posted October 14th, 2007 by Jen in family life, religion
12 Comments »

I’ve been furiously cleaning and decluttering my home over the past week. I’ve been yearning for simplicity, but the clutter around me has been just sucking the life out of me.

Do you see the irony of the two pictures above? My kitchen counter was so cluttered that I couldn’t even see my “Simplify” sign. That was a wake-up call for me!

I just dropped off five large bags of “stuff” at Goodwill, and 4 large bags of garbage were sent to the dumpster. So far. I have a ways to go. I started with the kids’ toys, and am moving on to the rest of our material items. Part of this project is simple cleaning, part is organizing, part is purging. This quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882) kept me on track:

We fill the hands and nurseries of our children with all manner of dolls, drums and horses, withdrawing their eyes from the plain face and sufficing objects of nature, the sun, and moon, the animals, the water, and stones, which should be their toys.

I can almost guarantee that if you are an average American, you have too much stuff. That your children have too many toys. Oh my, if Emerson thought this in the 1800s, what would he say today? I hope you are encouraged here to simplify with me.

The less objects in my home, the less chance of something getting left lying on the floor, causing me stress and wasted time. The more time for reading to my children or playing outside with them. And I discovered, after getting rid of those five big bags of toys, that the kids suddenly discovered new playthings. The three dolls I kept, the wooden blocks, the trains. Sometimes, when there is too much stuff, nothing gets used. Does that make sense?

If you want a golden rule that will fit everybody, this is it. Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful. William Morris (1834-1896)

Why do we feel so good when we go camping? I think it’s not just the out-of-doors and beauty of nature, but the lack of all our “stuff” when we’re in the wilderness. It weighs us down, and we don’t always realize it until it’s gone and we feel so free. I felt so much lighter when my living room went from this to this:

I just grabbed Celebration of Discipline by Richard J. Foster off my bookshelf. I’ve had this book for nearly 20 years, and seem to always come back to one of the disciplines during a critical point in my spiritual growth. Yes, there’s a chapter on simplicity! Simplicity should always begin in the heart, if you want a lasting thing.

The Christian Discipline of simplicity, says Foster, is an inward reality resulting in an outward lifestyle. Both aspects of simplicity are necessary. What is simplicity in one’s heart? As I look back over the past several months, I can see that my deep desire for simplicity in my home has been coinciding with an impulse for simplicity in my heart. Funny how I needed this pointed out to me! I liked this paragraph of Foster’s on the inward simplicity:

Experiencing the inward reality liberates us outwardly. Speech becomes truthful and honest. The lust for status and position is gone because we no longer need status and position. We cease from showy extravagance not of the grounds of being unable to afford it, but on the grounds of principle. Our goods become available to others. We join the experience that Richard E. Byrd, after months alone in the barren Arctic, recorded in his journal, “I am learning…that a man can live profoundly without masses of things.”

There is the necessity of living in the modern world, unfortunately! We are absolutely surrounded with a society lusting for affluence - how does one cope with that? One answer Foster gives is this: “It is time we awaken to the fact that conformity to a sick society is to be sick.” No one is going to even desire Christian simplicity until one recognizes the need to break away from People Magazine, reality TV shows, and the latest designer jeans. What do you think the Bible is talking about when it says to not conform to this world? (Romans 12:2)

We are free to receive God’s provisions, don’t get me wrong. “For the Lord your God is bringing you into a good land…a land…in which you will lack nothing” (Deuteronomy 8:7-9). It’s just all about the proper perspective. Creation is good and should be enjoyed! Material provisions are not evil, and forced poverty is wrong. The proper perspective should be that you are not wrongly attached to your provisions, but you freely and graciously receive all you have as a gift from God, to be shared with others.

And above all, even above seeking simplicity, is to seek first the kingdom of God. Then everything else will fall in its proper order.

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well. Matthew 6:33

Blessings to you as you work toward a heart and home of simplicity!

Feeling Like an Indian

Posted October 12th, 2007 by Jen in education, family life
2 Comments »

From Benjamin Franklin’s (1706-1790) Remarks Concerning the Savages of North America.

Treaty of Lancaster, in Pennsylvania, Anno 1744, between the Government of Virginia and the Six Nations. After the principal Business was settled, the commissioners from Virginia acquainted the Indians by a Speech, that there was at Williamsburg a College, with a Fund for Educating Indian Youth; and that, if the Six Nations would send down half a dozen of their sons to that College, the government would take Care that they should be well provided for, and instructed in all the Learning of the white People. It is one of the Indian Rules of Politeness not to answer a public Proposition the same day that it is made; they think it would be treating it as a light Matter; and that they show it Respect by taking time to consider it, as of a Matter important. They therefore deferred their Answer till the day following; when their Speaker began by expressing their deep Sense of the kindness of the Virginia Government, in making them that Offer;

“For we know that you highly esteem the kind of Learning taught in those Colleges, and that the Maintenance of our Young men, while with you, would be very expensive to you. We are convinced, therefore, that you mean to do us good by your Proposal, and we thank you heartily. But who are wise, must know that different Nations have different Conceptions of things; and you will therefore not take it amiss, if our Ideas of this Kind of Education happen not to be the same with yours. We have had some Experience of it: Several of our Young People were formerly brought up at the Colleges of the Northern Provinces; they were instructed in all your sciences; but when they came back to us, they were bad runners, ignorant of every means of living in the Woods, unable to bear either Cold or Hunger, knew neither how to build a Cabin, take a Deer, or kill an Enemy, spoke our Language imperfectly; were therefore neither fit for Hunters, Warriors, or Counselors; they were totally good for nothing. We are however not the less obliged by your kind Offer, though we decline accepting it; and to show our grateful Sense of it, if the gentlemen of Virginia will send us a dozen of their Sons, we will take great Care of their Education, instruct them in all we know, and make Men of them.”

I just had an interesting conversation with a friend from Bulgaria. He’s been here ten years now, and his insights on our public school system were interesting. He’s seen communism and post-communism in his homeland, and now American democracy. Given the distance of ten years, he can see both the good and bad in all the systems.

On education, he finds it appalling the lack of discipline in American schools. When he was counseled to not use the word “punishment” with his rebellious teenager, but rather “consequences,” he threw up his hands. We just had another school shooting in Ohio, and the violence, bullying, and drugs in our schools are famous. These problems begin in the home, where there is not proper training of children, then spill over into the schools where the hands of the school officials and teachers are usually tied - they can not hand out the kind of discipline that is meant to be dealt by a parent.

Like the Indians noted in Lancaster, our children are emerging from our public schools almost “totally good for nothing.” They are disrespectful, selfish, self-absorbed, undisciplined, and barely educated by the dumbed-down textbooks. They come back to us unable to engage in critical thinking, brainwashed with an atheistic, postmodern relativistic worldview, their love of learning destroyed.

But the good Department of Education still asks that we turn over our children. While I am obliged by their kind offer, I decline to accept it. And I would call on all able parents to instruct their own children in all they know, and make men and women of them.

Wordless Wednesday: Airing My Dirty Laundry

Posted October 10th, 2007 by Jen in carnivals, family life
2 Comments »

Just so you know what I’ll be doing every spare second of my day.

Current Blog Carnival update:

Carnival of Family Life
Carnival of Homeschooling
Christian Carnival
Carnival of Principled Government
Festival of Frugality

Progress at the Ranch

Posted October 8th, 2007 by Jen in education, family life, the ranch
13 Comments »

Building a house…we are determined to make this a positive experience for the family, despite the reality of the many pressures and strains such a project can create. We pray for grace and mercy in this endeavor.

Unless the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it. Psalm 127:1

So, here’s a little photo journey of the latest developments. We all worked and played there over the weekend, and our Friday homeschool day was spent learning about septic systems, barn building, pump houses, mixing concrete, and such.

As you can see, our house is framed, sided, and just about ready for roofing. We’re racing against the weather to be dried in before the rain and snow is upon us. This is my husband’s handiwork; he put an incredible amount of effort and detail in the design of this home. He’s been on-site managing and laboring from the beginning - and he’s doing an amazing job. His maddening profitable habits of perfectionism have made for a remarkably straight, square, and perfectly plumb house.

The pole barn/shop is on its way up, as well. I was dreaming of an Amish barn-raising, but it’s mostly just my husband doing the labor, with some help from whoever happens to be around. The poles are set in the concrete and this building will be done within a few weeks. It’s a simple structure, but the man is so excited to have a place for the tractor, the lawnmower, the bikes, the tools. Yes, we want to use the garage to actually park cars, not store the ranch equipment. Man, do you see those clouds rolling in? Hurry it up!

Some little child discovered the physics of wet concrete. There may be a shoe stuck down there. There is some magical, magnetic property of wet concrete, because my kids could not stay away from it. There were little piles of extra concrete that the mixing truck had dripped here and there between poles, and the kids were all over it. My 8 yr. old son quickly scooped together a pile, inserted a piece of metal rebar, and began to “build” something. He pounded with Dad’s sledgehammer and set the pole for his imaginary barn.

I hope the kids remember this time. I would love to raise my family in this home, on this land, but I don’t know the future. Come what may, I hope the kids tuck away treasured memories of helping their daddy build a house.

I wouldn’t have thought one could take such pride and joy in a septic system. However, this is a rockin’ septic system, folks! My husband could tell you all the reasons why, but I will not put you to sleep nor cause you to even imagine for a moment the reason one has a septic system. But when the inspectors come out and say, “You did this yourself?” you know it’s good. Actually, at every turn, the inspectors have said that to my husband. One even took a picture of his power trench to show the regulars how it’s done - step it up, a do-it-yourselfer is doing a better job than you.

This will be the pump house. I never thought about what a pump house was until we started this project. I think I was imagining the old days when people literally had to pump water by hand. The pump house is just a little storage building to protect the water pump and the pipes. The day after this photo, the older kids went back with Dad to finish the concrete for the pump house. They arrived home well after dark, and apparently the kids were an invaluable help. Sorry, I will admit I was a little surprised to hear this. My husband said he could NOT have finished it without them - they were the stir boy and stir girl, and he would have been facing a big glob of half-dried concrete without their tireless effort. When I gave the kids a bath that night, their hair looked gray.

It was not all sweat and labor, however. The kids and I gathered firewood, which they consider “fun,” not “work.” Because the purpose of gathering firewood is to have a campfire - nothin’ better than that! There is no shortage of firewood on the property, especially with all the downed trees which were cleared for the house. It was a quick and light task, and immensely rewarding.

Do your kids love to gather firewood? I don’t know any kids who don’t. The only problems encountered were fighting over choice pieces of wood, or arguing over whose turn it was to push the wheelbarrow. We somehow navigated those bumps without tears.

I had no trouble getting helpers to rebuild the fire ring, either. The original fire pit was bulldozed aside to make way for the path to the new pole barn. I’ve mentioned before the ROCK around here? I think the well-drillers went through close to 90 feet of solid rock before hitting dirt. Again, no shortage of rock, and with the purpose of gathering rock being to form a new fire pit, the workers were happy little helpers.

So, the day at the ranch ended with a stunning sunset closely followed by a lovely campfire, complete with the roasting of hotdogs and marshmallows, and even a few campfire songs. Kum-Ba-Yah, anyone? My husband said to me, “I hope we keep having these campfires even after the house is built.”

My Elk Hunt and Shoot

Posted October 5th, 2007 by Jen in family life, the ranch
9 Comments »

When I shoot elk, it’s with a camera. There’s a gorgeous herd across the field, at least two hundred of them, that I see everyday (and spy through the binoculars), and of late have been hearing in the early morning and late evening - have you ever heard an elk bugle? Wow, it’s nature’s music. Well, they are currently in “the rut,” and there is great purpose in their frenzy of bugling.

Several days ago, my neighbor let me drive up as far as I could on their property to try to capture the herd. Sorry to say, I do NOT have a camera with a powerful telephoto lens, otherwise you’d be seeing several bulls with enormous racks; as it is, you see specks in a field. I thought about trying to sneak up on the elk to get a closer shot, but these are wise creatures. They were very aware of our presence even from a distance, and stampeded away from us shortly after I snapped this picture.

I just had the girls with me, and my little darlings were absolutely as excited as I was with the captivating sight. My 6 year old has even mastered an elk call - thanks to Will Primos hunting videos.

We were bewitched by the elk, but the view of this valley from up here was simply enchanting on its own. Our house is one of those little white spots in the distance.

I’ll use this post as my entry for Sprittibee’s giveaway:

“I’m entering the Fall Five Kodak Printer Give-Away at Sprittibee’s Blog. Kodak and Sprittibee are giving away an EasyShare 5300 printer!”

I would really love to print out all the photos I’ve been accumulating on my computer and begin an album for the family. There’s nothing quite like a collection of photos in your hands that you can flip through and set out on the coffee table.

Too Many Choices?

Posted October 1st, 2007 by Jen in family life, parenting
9 Comments »

Can too many choices paralyze the modern parent? And her children? Decide for yourself - here’s an interesting article at The Parenting Post.

Author Barry Schwartz, in his book, The Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less, addresses this question as well. Publisher’s Weekly makes this comment about Schwartz’s book:

We normally assume in America that more options (”easy fit” or “relaxed fit”?) will make us happier, but Schwartz shows the opposite is true, arguing that having all these choices actually goes so far as to erode our psychological well-being.

Hmmm. Now, as a parent, I have to deal with the million-and-one choices somehow, because they aren’t really going away. The choices are in my face. Do I want regular or fat-free? Do I want organic, natural, or conventional? Do I want public or private? Do I use the Charlotte Mason, Classical, Principled, or Waldorf method of homeschooling? Granite, silestone, travertine, or ceramic tile? Music class, ballet, gymnastics, or soccer (or all four)? Here’s what Schwartz would advise:

If parents can develop the attitude that good enough really is good enough most of the time, it will help them to be much better than good enough at what matters most — being engaged, energetic, attentive and loving in their interactions with their children. It will also enable them to model for their kids a healthy approach to navigating the sea of choices that they will soon be responsible for making for themselves.

For my children, I can help them by limiting the choices I offer. (”Kids, you can choose from these three books for Mommy to read to you tonight,” instead of, “Pick out a book from that shelf of 100 books.”) I shouldn’t put the pressure on them to have to navigate the nerve-wracking array of choices unfettered. It’s incredibly stressful. My kids very often ask me to choose something for them, or to narrow the choices I give, when they are sensing a difficulty or confusion. Allow your kids the option of not having to choose, sometimes. This is not robbing them of any independence, it’s simply allowing them to remain psychologically healthy!

The tension between making choices on our kids’ behalf and empowering them to do their own choosing is fundamental to parenting. However, living in a choice-centered culture makes that tension far more pervasive. By all apparent measures, the culture of choice is here to stay. In order to help kids reap its benefits, parents must also be aware of its costs.

Just like we choose our battles with our children, we can choose when to choose. Not every situation which arises during the day should require a multitude of choices. As a parent, learn to quickly whittle down the options to just a few, and your children will be learning healthy decision making as they observe you.

********

Some carnivals to visit - only three to choose from :-)

The Carnival of Family Life
The Christian Carnival
The Carnival of Homeschooling